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Day 2 (Love stories)

shivrajs shivuu

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Only a few hours from arriving home I was up again, dragging myself to the shower to wash away the stench of last night and cleanse my soul. My mother was already confused as to why I was up so early but I didn’t have time to explain, I had a promise to keep and had well and truly thrown all my eggs in one basket with this time.

I caught the train back up to London and the whole time I couldn’t stop my mind from wondering if it had actually happened, had I met this girl, had I really promised to meet her at 10am? Either way I was going to find out shortly and I was making great time.

I got off at Covent Garden and walked out of the station to a clear blue sky, maybe a sign that it was going to be a good day, or maybe it was just a good day and the weather would have no effect on my day in particular. I found myself beginning to feel very anxious, I paused for a second and thought about turning back on myself, heading home and just forget about the whole thing. I began to twist on my foot until something took over, a newly found confidence, okay maybe confidence isn’t the right word but I knew I had to keep going otherwise I’d regret it.

I could see the hotel just ahead of me and I still had about 10 minutes before our rendezvous and I walked straight passed it, didn’t even slow down, but this was of course intentional. I though I would hang outside a small souvenir shop just passed the hotel, that way if it got to 10 and Evie didn’t show up at least I could just walk off without looking awkward and as if I had been hanging outside a hotel for no reason. For the next 10 minutes I flicked through the same postcards over and over on a rail outside the shop, all the while looking through the rail so I could see every person walk down the steps. It hit 10 and nothing, she hadn’t showed. My shoulders fell lower and I felt the life drain out of me, just as I was about to turn away she appeared, Evie and her sister, Ginny, walking down the steps onto the street. Her heard turning right and left, was she looking for me? Without a thought I stepped out from my hiding spot and into her line of sight, as soon as she spotted me I got to see the smile I had become all too familiar with the night before. “You actually came?” She said with a hint of relief. “Well I made a promise.” I replied. We both exchanged subtle smiles before Ginny popped in, “So are we going to go?” Evie’s head turned to Ginny and then back to me, “We’re going to Buckingham Palace if you want to come? You can be our tour guide?” As much as I hated the idea of being a tourist in the city I had pretty much grown in I wasn’t exactly going to decline and go home. “I’d be honoured.” Perhaps my response was too keen but it went down well with both girls.

The walk to the Palace was long, but it gave me more time to talk with Evie, learn about her and listen but I often found myself distracted by the smile of hers, in such a short time I had come to love it. I had to constantly talk myself out of the idea of falling for her, but I found it so hard, the way she would twist and turn was like she was a ray of sunshine.

The Palace itself turned into a bit of a photoshoot with yours truly taking up the mantle of pro photographer, this gave me more time to admire Evie’s beauty and I started to pick out differences between her and Ginny, to me they weren’t identical, nor even twins, Evie was unique.

The day became a great success, it was so natural, nothing was forced and it left me wanting more. I knew that it was important not to overstay my welcome and burn it out so quickly so I called it a day around evening time, Evie seemed as disheartened as I felt but again I promised I would be at the foot of the steps the next day. By now we had managed to find a way to text too, this meant arranging meeting up was about to get a whole lot easier, and my nights would be spent talking to her.

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Love Stories

My tragic love life (Love stories)

shivrajs shivuu

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This might seem unbelievable, believe what you want. Please tell me on any grammar mistakes and please don’t feel bad for me. I have more stories of me with her, so upvote if you want to see it

I’m laying in bed, my pillow wet with tears. However this is not where my story begins. Seven years ago, while riding a bike down my neighborhood, my eyes gazed upon a girl, my age. I wanted to know more about this mystery girl. Later that month, the neighborhood was holding a goodbye party to one of our neighbors. I was running around with soft grass below my feet, playing tag with this mystery girl. She was nice and very beautiful. 2 years later, I asked her on a date to go see Captain America The Winter Soldier. The rest of the year consisted of movie nights. I used to play piano for her back when I used to play. We spent every moment possible with each other, she was my best friend ever. Then, in September of 2014, we had our first kiss. We then skip to the summer of 2018. My girlfriends’ parents were going through their first divorce. She would always come over to my house crying her eyes out. I offered to take her to Honolulu. Her parents agreed because they had a uncle who lived on that island who could look over us while we were there. Her parents provided plane tickets and my parents paid for the hotel. As we were driving to our hotel, my girlfriend was using my leg as a pillow, and there are few things that I will remember, but that is one thing I will never forget. When we check into our hotel room, we look upon the wonder of the room. Second floor, overlooking the beach, one queen sized bed, a kitchen, porch, one large bathroom and a fridge with a water dispenser. We set our packs down and decided just to sleep, we had a long flight. In the morning we wake up around 10 A.M(Hawaii time) or 1 P.M. (Arizona Time) to the birds chirping. We go eat eggs and bacon for breakfast, and walk around the hotel that we would be staying in for the next 2 weeks. It had a restaurant, pool, shop, and a great view of the ocean. Around 4 P.M, She gets a text from her uncle telling us to meet him out in the front of the hotel at 5 to go out to eat dinner and look around the town. We had a great meal and nothing huge happened the first couple of days. After a shower, we get dressed and walk onto the porch, and this is the moment in my life that I cry over every time. I look to my side and she looks at me, and she has a large smile. Her white teeth, hazel eyes, the sun shining on her dark and blond hair which was covering one eye, her beautiful skin. She was perfect. I hugged her close and the smell of her shampoo drowned out the smell of the ocean and said three words to her, “I love you.” From that moment on we knew, our love was true. After we got home, her parents had sorted everything out and were together again. Now I wish this is where the story ends, with a happy ending and all, but there is some more. About 6 months after our trip, her parents got divorced again. Her father got custody during the majority of the year, and he lived in New York. Her father got custody on school breaks (summer, winter, spring, etc). The last time I saw her was the day after I found out, and that was also our last kiss, and date. After about a week, we had been talking about our plans because we never broke up. We planned to get married after college and once we had stable jobs and a good house, have kids. I wish this was the end, 2000 miles apart, but still together. 10 days later, on the day of our 5 year anniversary, I got the worse news a human can get. She was hit by a car. The car that hit her got T-boned by a person who ran a red. The car hit with such force that it sent the car right into Perfect as she walked across the street. I was informed 2 hours later, that she had died. Now we reach the part were I cry my face off. The person I wanted to have a family with, the Perfect girl, smart, nice, beautiful, perfect in every way. I asked the cemetery If I could get buried next to her so I could lay with her until the sun burns out of the sky. They said that it was first come first serve at their place but that they could hold a spot for maybe a year. So here I am, a guy, who has a girlfriend who is dead, as we never officially broke up. I have one picture of her left on my phone per request of her after our last date. I am afraid to love again, because of the love I loved. I gave it my all, and lost it all with her. Every morning when the morning dawns, I remember that she was gone. Every night, as the will set, I will remember the amount of love I can get. Remembering the chance I blew, I asked “how can I go on without you?” There last thing I said to her was, “please don’t go.” I wish I told her that I love her.

 

So last winter I was going on a trip with my girlfriend at Lake Tahoe. We were both 16 at the time and our parents figured that we would need maybe a pilotless of supervision. (My company my dad works for owns condos in different places and one was at Tahoe and he had co-workers who lived there). My girlfriend and I stayed at the condo and everyday we were to check in with my dad’s friend. We were there for a week and every went nicely. We went skiing a lot because we loved to ski.

I have one picture on my phone of her when from Tahoe that I found recently on my phone. She was in a red sweatshirt that covered her 2 tattoos that she got while in our previous trip to Hawaii and she was also wearing jean shorts, for some reason while in a really really cold place. Her bronze color hair covering her face as the sun reflected off of it. And as she was fixing her shirt. She looked up at me, smiled and said, “I love you”

Then on April 4th, the unthinkable happened. It was the day of our 5th anniversary, and she was hit by a car while she was living in New York. She died before I was able to say “I love you”

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Love Stories

A day of the strangest vacation (Love stories)

shivrajs shivuu

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That fucking life…..sometimes it’s good(not exactly) sometimes it’s the worst thing in the actual life.Man I personally don’t like the life in some aspects like love and such cuz when you’re nerd in life which is controlled by some lookin good football dump guys or some very dump one’s.Now I’m writing that cuz I’m really dump guy.In overall I hate my life which is not so good thing cuz I know some humans that they don’t have house’s or something like that.Now I’m on some dump night club on vacation with the guys from the dances (yeah I dance and it’s horrible)and there is that other guys from the other town (I’m living in little country)and I saw one girl which is totally awesome and I pretend to like her ,but hey that’s that other guy who is pretty handsome and actually good lookin but that’s the not so good part…and  yeah and the other shitty part is that I’m 13 yrs old and on that club I can’t drink alcohol and such so I can’t die with methanol (really shitty)and yeah before that I was on vacation for 6 days and I wasn’t there for the first day (I was screwed) which was fill with the best things from the vacation (that’s what I heard cuz I wasn’t there)and this is the third day from the vacation and yesterday and the other day we played some really dump game that I don’t like so much (something like challenging each other)and there was that challenge to kiss that girl(the other football average poor guy )and I was like hell no,but hey it’s fact and right now I’m like depressed nerd on night club.If someone read that shit(I don’t know if I gonna post that on some social platform or such) I’m gonna continue the stories…..And here’s me 5 mins after I started writing that they actually are together (aaaaah)and the couch actually helped for that.Im good for that I have some friends for help and hearing my shit but I really don’t get how that life works cuz one day it’s complete shit(like really fucked up day)and one day actually average good(for me the day it’s never good but for people it’s)and I’m really wondered how that helps for any reason I’m realigious and for some humans that’s normal to believe in something but I believe…..in something that I can’t figure out but some day I’ll find out what is it(I’m hoping to die tomorrow but the hopes are free they say).Hey I’m back after like 40 mins and that guy was chosen to go on competition on stripteaser pylon with 3 other guys and he actually won (hell as fuck for me)and the life is trying to prove that I’m complete idiot and don’t have luck overall….I hate the life that I’m living….Bruh that life is trying to  god damn prove me I’m shit…Hey I think this little story should have some kind of end(doesn’t it)so I’m back from that shitty club and  when we’re goin to the hotel I talked a little bit with girl and she told me(after a hour)she actually doesn’t want to be with him so I was like hell yeah but the hard part is to tell to the dump guy and all’s done….

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Love Stories

Marrying a Man in Prison (Love stories)

shivrajs shivuu

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Over a year ago I was watching a lot of prison shows and seen that not a lot of people in there had friends or family and they were kind of lonely. So I went online and wanted to give someone a friend. I was searching and I looked in my own state because maybe I did want to meet them some day and give them a real friendship. I looked at men because I have a tendency to not get along with women over text so it would probably translate the same in letters.

I found this man with one picture on his bio that a friend of his probably set up. He had handsome blue eyes and some face tattoos. In his bio he wrote about his love for motorcycles, his religion, and other things. There was something about him that I liked. He was older than me and I decided that he would be the person I would offer a friend to. I wrote him a short paragraph and didn’t know all what to say and sent it off.

I anxiously waited to see if I might have gotten a chance to talk to someone knew. Looking back on that time I thought I wanted to give someone a friend but I think I was also looking for a friend for myself. I was lonely at the time dealing with depression and I didn’t really have luck with friends anyways.

I got a letter back and opened it right in my car. I was excited to read it and I smiled the entire time while reading it. I seen this amazing man and someone excited that someone responded. He told me a bit about himself and then left it up to me if I wanted to continue writing to him. Of course I responded immediately. When that second letter came I could just read how happy he was that I still wanted to talk to him. I could just see the happiness grow the more and more we talked. He didn’t talk to his family anymore at the time and really only had one other person he talked to.

We talked more and more and then it led to phone calls. We talked as much as we could. We got to know each other so we’ll. He was amazing. We then started talking about more than being friends. After several months of friendships we started dating. And then I went to visit him for the first time. I was so nervous. Then we really only got closer from there. We’ve had our ups and downs since he did have a lot of hard days where he thought I’d be better off without him. I’m in college and there’s a 20 year age difference between us. But every time we got through it we got stronger. I love this man so much. I’ve started talking to his family. And we came to this feeling of how much we love each other and we didn’t want to wait until he got out to get married. So I married the man of my dreams.

My family disowned me for a while after I told them we got married and then we started talking again but things are still rough. But I am so happy with him. We plan on moving up to Alaska once he is out next year and settling down and having two kids and just enjoying life together. I wouldn’t change a thing. Meeting him in there is what really made us have a strong relationship. You get to know someone a lot better through long letters than through a text message. I found love and I couldn’t ask for anyone better.

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